Come on, vámonos. Everybody let’s go.
UPDATE 10/24/17: It’s been almost exactly two years, but more details on the live-action Dora the Explorer movie have emerged. Per The Hollywood Reporter, apparently the film is targeting a 2019 release and will be directed by Nick Stoller (Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Neighbors), and will be produced by…Michael Bay. The synopsis I made up in 2015 is now a horrifyingly possible reality.
The original story (10/26/2015) follows:
Paramount and Nickelodeon have announced that Dora the Explorer will become a live-action feature film! However, this adaptation of the beloved educational cartoon series is apparently set to be a gritty reboot of the franchise that will cater towards older audiences.
The film will reportedly feature Dora’s monkey companion Boots being brutally murdered by Swiper the fox, and the titular seven-year-old Hispanic girl seeking revenge.
Dora enlists the help of her trusty map (voiced by Christopher Walken) and backpack (Michael Cera) in her quest for vengeance.
In order to hunt down the psychotic fox that murdered her best friend/ lover, Dora must travel to the Big Red Hill.
To get to the Big Red Hill, Dora needs to go over the bridge and through the gate.
Bridge, gate, Big Red Hill, revenge.
Okay, just kidding. None of that was true.
The actual live-action Dora the Explorer film is being developed by Puss and Boots screenwriter Tom Wheeler, and will probably not feature murder or bestiality.
No release date has been set yet, but we hope that film takes inspiration partially from the College Humor video that predicted this would happen.
